Dear Readers, I've had it. After 50 years of saying "Take your head out of your ass" in a million different ways, I'm throwing in the towel. Figure out your own stupid little problems from now on. -Lifeless on Lake Shore

Esther Pauline Friedman
July 4, 1918
Died on
Saturday, June 22nd, 2002
Saturday, June 22nd, 2002
Also known as
Ann Landers
Eppie Lederer
Esther Pauline Lederer
Esther Pauline Friedman
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Guess the Stiff!

The worst thing about losing The King of the One-Liners is that even though it's the most obvious, worn-out, dull, insipid, overused, unfunny, hackneyed, banal, pedestrian, trite (not to mention stupid) obit line imaginable, we got e-mail from about 50 of you idiots telling us that the blurb on Henny shoulda been, "Take my life .... Please." Leave this stuff to the experts, huh? Please.

(d) February 24th, 1998